I am a dying sister #18

I miss you so much, brother.

I miss you and I don’t want to stop.

I can’t understand how could you go and never come back.

I can’t see how mom bites her lips and chocks her cry when she hears someone call your name.

I can’t see dad’s fragmented breath when he falls asleep on the couch.

I can’t understand why our friends left us. They better never should of come and promise “we’re here for you”.

I can’t understand the belief in faith and destiny. It makes me want to die too.

I can’t do anything for you. When it happened, I bagged God to give you ten years of my life. Nope. It didn’t help.

I can’t see who I am anymore.

I can’t recognize my tasks list.

I can’t feel anything.

I can’t be happy.

I am dying, brother, and I can’t stop it.

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