I am a dying sister#28

How I used to swing like a glass of wine with no  yeast

Move with no wind and think about the sadness that fills all of me

How I am stirring now the life inside of the death

And in fact nothing has changed during the last months


Someone cut the rope for me

And left me tied up

Someone cut the rope for me and left me

Left me all alone

Holding onto what was already  ripped and soon there is no rope anymore

Someone cut the rope for me

And I am still tied up


How I used to stand with my face to the wind and think about meaning and beat

Feeling my desires behind a delusional screen

And in fact nothing has changed because it is the same nothing during months


Someone cut the rope for me

And I am still tied up

Someone cut the rope for me and left me

Left me all alone

Holding onto what was already  ripped and soon there is no rope anymore

Who cut my rope

And who left me tied up


I am a dying sister #27

I am looking at my palm

It is holding the black ash

The wind is trying to rob what belongs to her

She is trying to ease her rage, in you

For all the world, from you

I am clenching my feast, stronger this time

Never letting go, never crying

Who says there is no phoenix

Coming back to where he belongs, like you?

I am a dying sister #26

Sell yourself

to the public

float on the river

bleeding in

coloring the world with your soul

breathing everybody

into you

letting them juggle

then puking them out

to the loneliness

going back

to your corner

finding this hole, this hole

crumbling inside

to your skin

flattening your mind

to infinity


I am a dying sister #25

They say your soul is million pieces

Million pieces rolling in the seven worlds

They say there is no more “you”

You as I know, you as I love.

They say there is no more you, brother!

They say you turned into a dimension I can’t contain

and I can’t understand.

Is it selfish of me to want you as you?

to want you to leave angles and endless and seven worlds

to fall and to crash into the dirt,

to dig your way out,

is it selfish?

They say I am a fool for wounding my heart,

Looking at your pictures, everywhere.

They say it is just the body we lost,

The lost is a cover, a wrap, a trash bag.

Don’t look at his pictures, they say, don’t wound your heart by nonsense

The soul is here, is there- the soul is everywhere

Mourning with every tear, glowing with every happiness.

You are ruing him, you are ruing him- they say

By tears of nonsense, by mourning without an end

And I can’t contain and I can’t understand

I want to be selfish just with you.

Forgive me, it is so selfish of me

I think I will never understand.

I am a dying sister #24

One of your best friends just died. 

A motorcycle accident.


 The youngs are died before the olds?

18 year old is still a child.

Poor us, getting use to accidents.

Poor us, loosing our friends on the streets. loosing ourselves in sorrow.

He had a beautiful, beautiful motorcycle.


I am a dying sister #23

Kill me if you can

saith ME

Consume in wrath, consume and you be no more

No finger lift you lifted

Not by your thousands eyes might

Forced by Divine decree

Kill me if you can

for hearkened not to My voice

You had dominion, dominated you

Captured  in saith G-d fibrillation pleasure

I am a dying sister #22

Is there a fire


Are you tired

Of watching us cry?

Would it help you

Talking to you

Talking and talking

To the hovering mind?

Is it a comfort

For you too

Or you don’t miss it

At all

Was it bad to leave this

The life as we know

Do you really

Hang out with grandma

Or you found your friend

Who was spread


On the road?

I am a dying sister #21

Don’t make me quit, darling.

Don’t make me forget the open mouth, the dried palate, the nightmare sleep.

Don’t make me sweep the dust, close the window, move my bed.

Don’t make me enjoy the taste of chocolate, the quick pleasure, the nights.

Don’t make me color my eyes, pluck my brows, have it tight, tight all over.

Don’t make me nice more than I am, smile more than I can, flatter more than I should of.

Don’t make me thankless, unbeliever, barren.

Don’t make me quit, darling.

I am a dying sister #20

Two wheat grains

To chew them, to chew and to swallow

I run barefoot into the wall, the bridge beneath is made of iron

Into the tunnel I run barefoot, to seat and to roll down

The day is not over yet

To get a taxi, to get a taxi before the sunset

To wake up from the hallucinations and to move, move the pillow

I see my figure from outside

And another one, she is me too, with short dress and curly hair

Hug, hug your arms and don’t let go

Don’t ask me to join you, don’t ask

Grandma, I don’t have clothes, I don’t have a suitcase

Again I wake up and the clock is changed

Hallucinations, hallucinations and a red cheek

To look away, to change sides,

To chew, to chew and to swallow.

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